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　　Yeah, I am back now, and feel a little bit miserable. To tell the truth, i hated the days i spent in HS very much, especially the first several days. I quarreled with him, I fought with him, I hated him. I hate HS very much, maybe that is because I spent a bad trip there, I told a lie to many people, and I guess I deserved such a terrible holiday.
　　
　　I also learnt that, you can not judge a man from his appearance, the inward culture and educated level plays an essential role. That is the experience I got from the trip to HS. So that wasn’t totally a bad memory, after all I know how to choose a husband in the future, I am a little more mature.
　　
　　I find I am in an extremely abnormal living status. The pain, guilty and jealousy keep on attacking my fragile heart all the time. I really hate it happening, tears always drop down these days. I hope I could be able to be as happy as before, at that moment, I was alone, but not empty; I was not as fashion and sexy as now, but leaded a healthy life; I was nobody, but no one else could be able to influence my mood. All changed a year ago, my chaos life took me to the endless darkness from then on.
　　
　　Many good man own several women simultaneously, that is really a horrible truth. I do know it, and it effects my viewpoint about marriage, love and loyalty. I believe in none of them, and I know I wont believe in any man, any promise, any hug and any kiss. They are only meaningful at the time when they are happening, after that, I should forget them, though it is rather hard for an amorous girl, I have to.
　　
　　The weather outside is quite compatible with my feeling inside…